Friday, 20 January 2012

049; Hold me, hold me tonight.

Lately I've been dreaming of being left behind--betrayed, abandoned, or simply just forgotten. I am easily forgettable. He hasn't been around lately; I'm alternating between hating him and needing him. Mostly I stay curled up in bed, crying and hitting the wall. My hand is covered in reds and blues and yellows and it's beautiful. I've also taken to smoking in my room again.. if mother finds out, she'll be furious. I burn incense to hide it. (I just want to escape.)

I'm eating less, but healthier. Today: a bowl of cereal (115) with milk (100), a handful of mixed nuts (116), one kiwi (46), two slices of rye bread (166) with butter (166 356), a diet shake (180) = 913 calories.

Songs I've been listening to a lot lately:
Broken Brights by Angus Stone
The Longest Day by Laura Gibson
Colorblind by Counting Crows
O' Sister by City & Colour
Dead Deer by Lovers


  1. You are not forgettable, darling <3 NOT.

    Sv: Hehe jag funderar på att beställa hem själv, göra lite örhängen och halsband :O

  2. You are not forgettable, do not ever think like that. It's a hard thought process to reverse but there are so many people in this community that are here to support you, myself included.
    Let yourself feel, if you want to stay in bed all day then do that for yourself. I can really relate to this post, if you read a bit of my blog maybe you'll feel similar. If you ever want to talk please feel free to message me, day or night.
    Love is here.